T is for Things I Miss About Mulder
Yesterday was 6 months since our sweet boy Mulder died from Lymphoma. We all miss him so much. He was such a joy in our lives, and such a good boy (except when he was being a butthead). In honor of Mulder, then, here are some things that I miss with him gone, and a few that I don’t.
Things I Miss
- Mulder putting his chin on my leg and gazing up at me, asking for love (or dinner)
- My daily walking companion – I miss this SO much. Especially on Fridays, I miss our long walks.
- Begging for cucumber when I’m cutting it.
- Begging for bread when I’m cutting it.
- Begging for carrot when I’m peeling it.
- Seeing him sleeping with his tummy pressed against the wall.
- Cuddling and petting him while I watch TV.
- Coming and plopping himself down while I’m doing yoga, right in my way.
- His little nose peeking out when I open the door, welcoming me home.
- That contented SIGH he would make in the evening, when everyone is home and where they belong. He was such a homebody.
Things I Don’t Miss
- Picking up dog poop. Especially warm dog poop.
- Having to pull Mulder away from the fence in our back yard, when he and the neighbor dog, Riyu, would try to fight. I was not really afraid they would hurt each other, but there is a lot of wood there and I could see some coming off in a paw or a mouth or an eye.
- Waking up to the sound of a dog vomiting (he had a sensitive tummy even before his chemo treatments)
- Cleaning up dog barf from the carpet (We still have stains, and Ted sings, “Always something there to remind me…”)
- Worrying about Mulder being sick. SO MUCH WORRY.
- SO MUCH DOG HAIR EVERYWHERE.
- Vet Bills (actually, we are still paying on this, we used Care Credit, which was very helpful for us.)
- Having to figure out care for him when we would go out of town. Ted’s aunt and uncle used to take him, but they moved a couple of hours away. Ted’s parents took care of him when we went to Portland and Hawaii in 2021, but he was a little rambunctious and I worried. Needlessly, thank goodness.
Things I Shouldn’t Miss, but I Do
- Him barking whenever a neighbor walks by (our living room window is RIGHT next to the path to a couple of units in our townhome complex)
- Him barking so hard that he stands up straight and falls over backwards (OK, this was hilarious. It only happened a couple of times.)
- Having to be careful when I move my chair while I’m working, not wanting to run him over.
- Him jumping on me in a panic any time I cleared my throat, or, god forbid, sneezed. It freaked him out.
30 Comments
Ally Bean
I like these photos. Mulder was a goof, like all good dogs are. I do imagine it was hilarious to see him barking so hard he’d stand up then fall over backwards. That was quite a feat.
J
Ally, thank you. Yes, he was SUCH a goof. I wish I had video of him barking like that.
Elisabeth
Such a lovely tribute to a beloved member of your family. Thanks for sharing. And goodness, he is so photogenic. What a gorgeous dog <3
J
Thanks Elisabeth, he was SO handsome, wasn’t he?
nance
This is a great post. I love the photos, and I can feel the love and joy you feel for Mulder and his life with you. It takes a long time to navigate the loss of a beloved member of your family. Being able to smile when you recall things is a big step in the process. Sharing is, too.
J
Thanks Nance, I still cry more than I smile, but slow progress is better than no progress, I guess.
NGS
Oh, this is so very sweet. Whenever Hannah puts her little head on my knee, I try to stop whatever I’m doing to give her whatever she wants (attention, mostly) because I know she won’t be around forever. This made me tear up a little: Having to be careful when I move my chair while I’m working, not wanting to run him over. Just last night Hannah was under the dining room table when we were having dinner and my husband and I were constantly reminding each other not to kick the dog or push our chairs in.
J
Thanks Engie. Our time with our pets is so short. I mean, we had Mulder for 7 1/2 years, but it wasn’t even close to enough. Sigh. I know you enjoy your beautiful Hannah and Zelda. <3
Allison
Oh my goodness, he’s so beautiful. What a loss. (except for the poop, which must have been gigantic). I don’t know what I’ll do some day without Lucy’s little nose and entire butt wagging at the front door when I get home. I’m so sorry, and thank you for sharing.
J
Thanks Allison! Yes, this is a difficult loss for us. Except for the poop. And the vomit.
Suzanne
Awww Mulder. This was such a beautiful post. So many things to love, and it’s also nice to reflect on the things that we don’t miss. Thank you for sharing photos and memories of your fluffy friend.
J
Thanks Suzanne, it’s theraputic in a way. I like remembering him, though it does make me cry.
Margaret
What a precious list of memories, even the not-so-fun ones! Our beloved animals are like people in that they have unique personalities and habits; they can’t help the negatives, unlike us. Thank you for sharing this beautiful dog with us!
J
Margaret, I like that attitude, that they can’t help their negatives. Perhaps had we worked harder with him, he could have helped the barking all of the time, but of course he couldn’t help barfing.
Ernie
Oh, this is such a sweet tribute. I’m new here, so I missed out on stories of him, but I can see how much he is missed and how well he was loved. He sounds just wonderful. The face on your knee and the sigh when everyone was home. Oh, my heart. Thanks for sharing your sweet memories.
J
Thanks Ernie, he was a cuddle bug for sure.
Sarah Jedd
(((hugs)))
I love the piture of him all wet– he was so fluffy but also small underneath that gorgeous mane.
J
I know! I posted pictures at the time on Facebook, and people who knew him in real life said, “Wait, is that Mulder? I wouldn’t even recognize him!” HA!
Nicole MacPherson
Vet bills and figuring out what to do with the dog when travelling are the two worst things about dog ownership. Even picking up poop and cleaning up vomit don’t faze me as much as those two things.
Mulder! What a sweet boy. xo
J
We found a dog sitter we could leave him with once, and that was great. It was scary at the time, though! Thankfully our neighbor had used this sitter, and could recommend her, or I don’t know what we would have done.
Vet bills. Ugh. I’m going to take a closer look at pet insurance next time we get a dog, I have a feeling it has changed a bit since I last looked into it.
Jenny
OMG, these pictures are precious. I remember your Friday walks with Mulder! It’s so, so hard to lose a pet- especially a dog like Mulder who was such a character (I’m laughing at the thought o him barking so hard he falls over backwards.) You’re doing well- the first year after losing someone is the hardest, and you’re already halfway through. <3
J
Thanks Jenny, it is so hard.
San
He was such a beautiful and sweet dog. I can’t believe it’s been 6 months already!
J
San, me too!
Stephany
Oh, Mulder. What a sweet boy. Figuring out what to do with your dog during vacations is the one thing I don’t miss – even if you find a good person, it can be SO EXPENSIVE. I like being able to leave my cats alone and just having someone check on them once a day. So much easier/cheaper!
J
Stephany, YES! We only had to board Mulder once, when we went to a family wedding, and all of our regular dog sitters were there. It was about $60 a day, but it was in someone’s house and she sent us pictures and took such good care of him. I hated it though, I felt so badly leaving him there. He jumped on me when I was leaving, saying, “WAIT, DON’T FORGET ME!” I cried a bit, kind of like the first time I left my daughter with a babysitter.
Tobia | craftaliciousme
I am sorry this is still very hard for you.
Lovely tribute.
J
Thank you Tobia!
Beckett @ Birchwood Pie
Julie, this was such a beautiful post. I didn’t leave a comment before because I wasn’t ready to talk about it last week, but this was when I knew we didn’t have much time left with our dog. All the things that you said, except that our loss is recent enough that I would give anything to pick up a big warm handful of poop. I know she’s gone, but I still look behind me before I move my desk chair, and I miss those sighs and the doggie snores so much.
J
Thanks Beckett, I just read your post, I’m so very sorry. I would gladly pick up warm poop if it could give me my boy back! Healthy and strong of course, not sick or suffering. HUGH SIGH.