U is for Updates

This whole NaBloPoMo thing has been great, and my idea of using the alphabet prompts has kept me very organized. I pre-loaded a lot of the posts, so I could spend more time coming to your blogs and reading. This has not always worked, since life does get in the way sometimes, so I’m a little behind in the commenting and reading department, but just like all of us, I’m doing my best. For today though, I thought I would catch you up on what I’ve been up to.

The Japanese Gardens in Portland, Oregon

I took a very quick trip to Portland a couple of weeks ago to say goodbye to my step-mom’s partner, Tom. Long time readers will know that my father died suddenly of a heart attack while hiking in the Dolomites with my step-mom, Julie, back in 2017. It was an absolute shock. You can read about what an amazing man he was here. In 2021, she met Tom, a physician and scientist in Portland, and they fell in love. He moved in with her last year. He had several kinds of cancer, and fought most of them off, but earlier this year he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, which took his life at the end of October. So I flew up to Portland to be with her for the funeral. I didn’t know Tom well, I only met him when they came down to visit us in 2022, but I know that he made Julie very happy. Of course at a funeral you learn a lot about a person, and his friends, his children, his step-children, and his grand-daughter talked about what a kind, involved, loving, curious man he was.

My beautiful sisters and their beautiful families

The upside of this trip was that I got to see my twin sisters, who both live in Portland. I stayed with Melissa (second from the left, above), and we enjoyed our day together…we went for a long walk in the morning, enjoyed an incredible breakfast at a nearby bakery, and marveled at the beautiful fall foliage. After we were cleaned up and dressed for the funeral, we went to the glorious Japanese gardens. I spent less time with my other sister Maya (she of the incredible garden house, second from the right, next to me in the front), since she had to work in the morning, but it was great to catch up with her and her family at the funeral and the gathering afterwords. I didn’t get to see their two oldest, they are away at college, but I did get to catch up with Sophie (next to Melissa) and Crow (behind Maya), and M&M’s husbands, Jason and Herb.

Yummy cookies!

Everyone has been talking about the perfect fall cookie that Suzanne linked to last year, and I was starting to have serious FOMO, even though we are not really cookie eaters around here. I had all of the ingredients except molasses, so I bought some, and I made them one afternoon last week. Unfortunately I was making split pea soup at the same time, so I neglected my timing and the first batch in the oven were overcooked. They were still OK, but not great, so I threw them away. What’s the point of not great cookies? Fine if you have to have them for some reason, but these weren’t going anywhere. The second batch I was more careful and they were perfect! I made gifts of some to our neighbors, ate a few, and sent a couple to work with Maya for her lunch/snack. They were delicious! Thanks blogging friends, for talking about these so much and convincing me to give them a try.

Why did I buy the matte? It was in the wrong place on the shelf.

I tried this Sally Hansen Gel topcoat (tip from Stephany, who got it from Nicole), but somehow managed to buy the Matte version, which looks horrible. So I had to put a shiny topcoat on top of that to give it some shine. My nails looked great until I decided that they were dry and I could start making soup and cookies, and messed them up royally. I need to give it another try when I won’t be touching anything for awhile.

For Mother’s Day this year, my daughter gave me a gift certificate for a facial. I’ve only had a facial once before, and I loved it. Somehow when I get a facial I think I should come out looking 25 (not going to happen, my daughter is 27.) So I went and got a facial last week, and I loved it. I don’t look 25, but my pores do look smaller, and my skin looks a little brighter. It was great.

5 chafing dishes, loaned to me by kind strangers!

I love my Buy Nothing group. For Thanksgiving this year, we decided we wanted to use chafing dishes for the hot items, instead of having everything on the table. There will be 11 of us this year, and the idea of hot food instead of lukewarm food is appealing to us. None of us own chafing dishes, so I posted on my local Buy Nothing to see if anyone had some we could borrow. Yay! They came through! Kind folks willing to let strangers borrow their items is so great.

Preparation for the Diwali ceremony

As we do every year, we celebrated Diwali with Ted’s parents and brother. Our celebration includes a small ceremony, inviting Lakshmi to bring the light into our homes and our lives, and honoring each other. We place candles throughout the home as well as outside, to help guide her way. Then we eat a delicious vegetarian meal. It’s a really nice holiday.

Lastly, we’ve been watching our fair share of TV, and even went to a movie. We saw the new Hunger Games prequel, which we liked. We’ve been watching The Golden Bachelor (Will Gerry choose Theresa, our pick? Will he kill himself because of the pain he is inflicting on these women and himself? Will they become a Thruple?), The Crown (Diana, wear your seatbelt! I don’t think I realized how little time she and Dodi had actually spent together), Lessons in Chemistry (My favorite character is the dog, 6:30), and The Gilded Age (Fun!). Oh, and The Great British Baking Show (I’m still sad about Saku going home, but now am rooting for Tasha. Or Matty.) Lots of good TV right now, especially if you spend far too much money on streaming services, which we clearly do.

41 Comments

  • Suzanne

    I am loving the alphabet structure of your posts, too — it’s fun to see what you come up with, plus, I keep seeing a letter and thinking, “We’re to U already!” or whatever.

    Yay for the fabulous fall cookie! Can you believe I still have not made a single batch this year?!

    I’m sorry to hear about your step-mom’s partner. The only good thing that accompanies death is the chance to reconvene with loved ones, so I’m really glad you got to do that.

    Your experience with the nail polish is so familiar to me. I cannot keep a manicure tidy to save my life.

  • nance

    Oh my gosh, the photo at the top of this post is incredible! What a gorgeous place. WOW.

    I’m glad you got to spend that time with your family in Portland despite the sad circumstances. As Suzanne said, the one benefit of a loved one’s passing is that it reminds you of the family still surrounding you.

    Please do let me know if you ever find the facial or product that restores you to your 25-year old self. I’d like to get in on that, especially if it gives me back my former neck.

    Totally with you on Saku. She made me laugh every single episode that she was on. I love that all the contestants are so genuine and down-to-earth.

    • J

      Isn’t it beautiful? There was an even prettier angle, but I didn’t want a picture with two people trying to take a selfie, and they WOULD NOT MOVE.

      I keep looking for something that will make me look younger than my age, and I keep not finding it. I mean, except for the hair color. That is something I guess.

  • NGS

    I love the alphabet structure! I also think it’s fun to think about what you’re going to do with some of the harder letters like Q and Z!

    I’m sorry to hear about the sad reason you went to Portland, but it does seem like you had a lovely time with your family.

    • J

      NGS, Q was Quet…I still haven’t figured out what I’m going to do with Z. Zero? Ze End? I won’t write about zebras, I hate them.

  • Ally Bean

    I’ve read wildly divergent reviews of The Crown, but you are enjoying it? I might watch, yet knowing Diana’s fate… I dunno. I want to see Lessons in Chemistry and might make it my next show to watch after I finish Endeavor.

    I saved Suzanne’s cookie recipe because those are my flavors! Thanks for linking to it. It’s been fun seeing you in my blog feed every day. I know it’s an effort to do all that is required for NaBloPoMo, but you’re doing great.

      • Ally Bean

        I’ve watched it from the beginning, too. It was so insightful and compelling at first, but once Charles met Diana I lost interest. It lost its charm and I felt like it has wandered from history into a soap opera. Like I said I’ve read so many reviews of this latest season, both pro and con. I’ll put you down for “pro”!

        [Sorry I didn’t reply back sooner, but I don’t receive any indication through WP that you’ve replied to my comments. I have to come back here on my own to see what you’ve said and sometimes I get busy elsewhere. You’re the only WP blog I follow that doesn’t let me know you’ve replied, btw.]

        • J

          Ally, yes, you’ve told me that before, and I have no idea how to fix it. Frustrating, right? There is a check box below my comment that says, “Notify me of follow-up comments by email”, which I am sure you select. So why doesn’t it let you know? I had hoped that this newer theme would have fixed that issue. Apparantly not.

          I agree about The Crown seeming more soap-opera now that they are in the ‘Diana’ years. I don’t like it as much as I did the early seasons, but I still like it!

  • Elisabeth

    What a lovely, lovely picture of your family. It made my heart so happy; I wish you were able to come together for a happier reason, but it just looks wonderful to have that time to spend with your family.

    I LOVE those cookies, make them regularly, and they are probably my family’s #1 now. So good!

    I also struggle to not smudge polish. It takes FOREVER to set?!

    And I am 2 seasons behind on GBBO. One of my to-do’s in my Year of Rest is to watch the series I’ve missed!

    • J

      Thanks Elisabeth! It’s hard sometimes, living so far from my family. This is a rare year when I see all of my siblings, though not together. I suspect the last time was when my mom died in 2008. My sisters don’t share the same mom with me (and my brother doesn’t share a dad with my sisters), but they came down to support me. One of my sisters came down for my daughter’s college graduation, but the other wasn’t able to. My brother was here then, too.

  • Margaret

    I too found a wonderful and caring man after my husband died; we’ve had over five lovely years together. I’m so sorry that Julie has faced loss yet again. I will need to look at those cookies because I am a cookie person. What a beautiful family you have!

    • J

      Thanks Margaret! I hope you enjoy the cookies if you try them. And I am so glad that you have found John, it gives a person hope.

  • Tierney

    I thought the story of cooking cookies and split pea soup was going to go in a different direction, e.g. a story similar to a “I swapped the sugar and salt” levels of bad combination and tasting disasters, but I’m glad it was less disgusting than that! I’m a year late to the party, but I will give the recipe a try. Thanks for sharing!

  • coco

    Funerals are never fun but you are so right about learning about someone in funerals. One thing that really made me thinking about how to live my life is Peter Attia’s quote: think what you want to hear in your funerals, not what goes on to your CV. I keep reminding myself about that, what kind of person I want to be to my loved ones instead of career ambitions, so I keep myself grounded.
    I didn’t know you have twin sisters, they seem so lovely. how do you keep in touch with them? i’m always wondering how my girls will be each other sisters when they grow up as they fight so much these days.
    No buying club sounds perfect for the age of abundanc.

    • J

      Coco, we mostly keep in touch via text and phone calls. I don’t have family nearby, so I don’t get to see anyone very often. Thankfully my husband’s family is here, and we’ve been together for so long, they are my family now. <3

  • Jenny

    What I’ve been wondering is, what are you going to do when you get to Z? Switch to numbers? Or switch to Greek letters (which is what I think they do for naming hurricanes?)
    The trip to Portland sounds bittersweet. Your poor step-mom- so now she’s lost two partners within six years? That’s tough.
    I’ve made those cookies! I didn’t eat them myself but they smelled great and my family loves them (I made them last year and this year.). Yum.

    • J

      LOL on the Greek letters. That is a direction I could go, isn’t it? I think I’ll go blog theme though. Meme for Monday, Wordless Wednesday, etc. There are only a few days to figure out.

      I really enjoyed my trip to Portland, though it was really quick and I feel so badly for my step-mom. She’s so healthy, I think she is going to have to start dating much younger men.

  • Beckett @ Birchwood Pie

    The alphabet idea is genius! But I’m dying to know what you’ve got planned for Nov 27 to 30.

    100% life is too short to eat cookies that didn’t turn out. I would have tossed the bad batch too.

    Ah you remind me why in theory I would like to paint my nails but never do – because I can never sit still long enough for them to dry!

    Also I would never have thought to post for stuff to borrow on a buy nothing group – more genius.

    I’m sorry for the loss of your stepmom’s partner. Tough times<3

    • J

      Suddenly I’m feeling pressure on 27-30!

      Buy nothing is fabulous. I have gotten things, gotten rid of things, and borrowed things. I love it.

  • San

    Oh, how wonderful you were able to go to Portland for the funeral of your step-mom’s new partner to spend time with her and your sisters. Such important time together!

    And now I am hungry for cookies (and we’re not a cookie household either ;)). Might have to bake some soon.
    I also love that you celebrate Diwali with Ted’s family. It’s wonderful to keep up with all the different traditions.

    • J

      Thank you San, it was really nice to go to Portland, even though it was such a quick trip.

      We love Diwali, it’s a lovely holiday.

  • Kyria @ Travel Spot

    I am not a huge TV watcher, but I did watch the first few seasons of the Crown and was looking foward to the latest one but I got rid of Netflix for a while. I will have to get it again and binge at some point. I also watched Anne With an E recently, which was cute, but didn’t follow the book that closely so some people did not like that. Also I watched 2 of the 4 All The LIght You Cannot See, which was an excellent book and the show seemed enjoyable so far, but that will also have to go on my Netflix binge list!

    Have a great Thanksgiving! I am so glad you got to see your family (even in the unfortunate situation), and I do love Portland, especially in the fall! Did you get to see the Halloween decorations while you were there? Last year I was there during Halloween and it was great!

    • J

      Thanks Kyria, I didn’t see too many Halloween decorations, it was the second week of November. The trees were changing color and getting ALL of the attention.

  • Melissa

    That’s so wonderful that you were able to catch up with your family. It must be hard not seeing them.

    I have missed the cookie talk but I’m bookmarking it for when I get home. I had a levain cookie in DC and in NYC and if they are like that I’m in.

    • J

      Melissa, thank you! Yes, it’s tough being away from my family.

      Regarding the cookies, I really liked them. My daughter is not really a molasses fan, so she would have preferred a plain chocolate chip cookie. I may need to check out the copycat of Levain for their chocolate chip cookies next. I have some chocolate chips in my cupboard…

  • Lisa's Yarns

    I’m so sorry for your step-mom’s loss. Those are 2 very signficant losses so very close to together. I am glad you could be there to support her at the funeral and got some bonus familly time in with your twin sisters!

    I’m having some FOMO related to those cookies, too, but I don’t know that my kids would eat them (they are very particular about flavor profiles) and I fear I would eat far too many of them! I’d have to make them gluten free so wouldn’t want to give them away to others because if you don’t need to eat GF you shouldn’t since GF baked goods are just not the same! All that said, I bought molasses for another recipe years ago so this would be a good way to use some of that!

    • J

      Lisa, yeah, that’s a pretty specific issue (the cookie issue – GF and molasses perhaps not being in the kids’ wheelhouse) I would likely give mine away on the Buy Nothing group!

  • Ernie

    I am with you on enjoying NaBlogPoMo and trying to stay on top of all the reading. Your alphabet posts have been a had a fun structure to the month and I’m always surprised at how far into the month we are.

    Your visit to Portland sounds lovely, while surrounding an unfortunate loss. I think it was wonderful that your step-mom found a companion to grow close with and that you and your sisters were supportive of that. I love that you learned more about Tom at his funeral. The photo of the garden is breath-taking.

    I’ve never heard of posting something to borrow. What a great thing and so neighborly.

    I hate it when I buy something and realize I got the wrong thing. Ugh. I haven’t made those cookies yet. I should give them a try, but my people are fairly obsessed with my standard cookie offering. I wonder though, would they be thrilled if I inserted a new option into the mix.

    I just read your dad’s obituary. He was a very impressive man, who was clearly devoted to service of others and causes that mattered. My heart breaks that he was gone so soon.

    • J

      Oh Ernie, thank you for reading my dad’s obituary. He was 1 in a Million for sure.

      I love the Buy Nothing group, and that you can BORROW things instead of buying or renting is great!

      Yeah, I’m grumpy about the nail polish, but thankfully the solution is pretty simple. Just add some shine on top. Which probably makes it even thicker so it takes even LONGER to dry.

  • Tobia | craftaliciousme

    The alphabet structure is so genius. A really cool guideline and smart thinking as you can line up posts.
    I think I need to have a look at these cookies everyone is talking about.

    Thank you for asharing abit about the Diwali celebrations. It is a very foreign holiday for me bit I love learning more. To bad D is already gone otherwise I would have asked you to write more about it.

    Enjoy your holidays.

    • J

      Thanks Tobia! We really enjoy Diwali, it’s pretty chill. I’ve done the A-Z posting a few times now, it really does help you to get organized ahead of time, which is good for a busy month like NaBloPoMo.

  • Stephany

    It’s been so much fun following along on your alphabet journey through NaBloPoMo. I may steal it next year, if I can think of topics for all letters of the alphabet!

    I’m sorry to hear about your stepmom’s partner. That’s so sad. I’m glad you were able to go to Portland to celebrate his life with family.

    Whenever I do my nails, it’s the last thing I do before I go to bed and I make sure I let them dry for at least 20-30 minutes before doing ANYTHING. It’s annoying but the only thing that works to keep them from smudging!

    • J

      Stephany, I’m determined to make the nail polish work. Now that we’re past Thanksgiving, perhaps I’ll have time to just SIT for a bit and let them dry properly.