Musings

  • This is Us – 30 Years In

    Ted and I are celebrating our 30th anniversary today. Sometimes I cannot believe it has been that long, but then I look in the mirror and realize that we are getting older, and I guess it makes sense. We met in 1987 at San Francisco State University. He was a Film major, and I was an International Relations major, and we were taking one of the required classes, Speech 150. It was not love at first sight, he thought I was a spoiled rich girl, and I thought he was full of himself. As time went by that semester, we got to know each other a bit more. I met…

  • Songs About Relationships

    I’m not sure if I have mentioned it here before, but my husband Ted has a music podcast, Planet LP, which has morphed over the years. When he first started as a way to entertain himself and stay creative in the early days of the podcast, he talked about music and books. Then he took on a cohost and the format turned to music only. Eventually, his cohost realized that he was too busy for the commitment, and is now an occasional guest. At one point Ted’s podcast was once a week, but when he started at his current job, he realized he had far less down time than his…

  • Land Mines

    This morning I woke up from a disturbing dream. I was sitting at an outdoor cafe, and my friend Katie, along with some family and friends, walked past on the sidewalk, pretending that they didn’t know me. I caught up with them, and asked one of the friends what was wrong, why was Katie mad at me? “Because you didn’t bring a gift to her funeral.” Oh. Rats. I should have done that. Wait, I DID bring a gift…I brought a framed photo of Katie and Janet and me. Perhaps my card with the gift had gone missing. I was so sad to have Katie mad at me. Later, her…

  • Friday Thoughts

    I saw this sad little vase of flowers on my sad lonely walk the other morning, and it felt right to me. I feel flat and sad without Mulder. It’s been two weeks now since he died. I know that we did the right thing, but gosh, it still hurts. It is, however, getting a little less painful, a little easier. I no longer expect to see him when I come downstairs. I no longer think he will come put his chin on my knee and beg for dinner every day at 4:30, knowing that dinnertime isn’t for another 1/2 hour, but hoping against hope that I have forgotten how…

  • Mother’s Day

    Mother’s Day turns bittersweet when your mother dies. A day to celebrate her when she is not here, it is difficult. I miss my mom every day. When I had Maya and became a mother, I felt a different bond with my mom than I had had before. I understood her more. She gave me such grace and understanding, laughed with me, gave me guidance. She was proud of the mother that I became. I don’t think there is anyone in your life that will love you as unconditionally as your parents, with the possible exception of your child or your dog. I am very thankful to have had the…

  • Friday Randomness – Catching Up

    First off, Happy (belated) Birthday to my wonderful husband, Ted! I shared this picture last year too, but I like it, so I’m sharing it again. His birthday was Wednesday, and he and Maya both took the day off from work. I worked, but knocked off a little early. Maya took Ted out for breakfast, and then they went bookstore shopping, which is something we all love doing. They came home and watched Dune, which they both enjoyed. Ted had seen it when it came out, but Maya hadn’t. I worked for the first hour, so I came in too late and didn’t really pay attention. We went out for…

  • Changing the Subject (Mostly)

    This is Ted looking cute at a local restaurant in our town. We went downtown last weekend and had a snack and some wine, then went to a bookstore. Some of my favorite things: Ted, food, wine, books. Excellent way to spend a Saturday afternoon on a beautiful day. This is one of the dishes we had. I did not take a picture, this is from the restaurant Facebook page. It’s asparagus, labneh, blood orange, arugula, and a ‘perfect egg’. The picture has spring greens, but ours was just arugula, which is fine by me, because I love arugula. When the menu said ‘perfect egg’, I assumed that was going…

  • Inertia

    This meme or whatever has nothing to do with anything at all, and neither does my post. I’m just trying to be here. I’m frustrated with blogging right now, because I can’t leave comment on so many of your blogs (via my iPad) and it doesn’t really feel safe to use my work computer. I need to try Ted’s desktop, perhaps that is the solution. And to be clear, I don’t have trouble leaving comments on ALL of your blogs, just some, but somehow the knowledge that I am having trouble sometimes seems to have stymied me from even READING any blogs lately. I’m just playing stupid games on my…

  • Covid Update – On the Mend

    The picture above crossed my mind this week, with all of us down with Covid at the same time. Thankfully this was not our experience at all. Ted was past the worst of it by the time Maya and I were down. None of us got all that sick, though being sick is never fun. We all took varying amounts of time off from work, we all worked some from home, none of us had to go anywhere. Ted’s parents cooked us dinner one night. His brother brought us lunch another day. We ate leftovers and got curbside pickup at the grocery store. A kind neighbor sought out the sore…

  • Meme Monday – Covid Edition

    Well, Ted tried his best to keep us safe, but our house is just too small, and Covid is too virulent. I tested positive Sunday morning, and Maya tested positive this morning. I feel like we’re at different phases, with Ted on the mend, me in the midst of it, and Maya on the decline. Mostly it feels like a head cold. At this point, all we can do is stay away from everyone else, and hope none of us have long Covid. I am very thankful for grocery delivery and curbside pickup. Early in the pandemic, in the lock down phase, it felt selfish to me. Like, “I’m not…

  • Current Situation

    Today is my Fabulous Friday, which was supposed to be spent with my friend Neva, trying out a new pasta place downtown, drinking some wine, walking and talking and catching up. Then Ted started feeling poorly, and took a COVID test on Wednesday. You can tell by my tone that he tested positive. Sigh. Neva’s son is high risk for lung issues, and has been hospitalized a couple of times with COVID, and we are trying to avoid that happening again. So we have postponed, we’ll get together in a few weeks instead. At times like these, I wish we had a guest bedroom. As it is, Ted is wearing…

  • PSA – Girl Scouts

    Girl Scouts Troop 6000 is a program designed to help girls living in temporary housing in the New York City shelter system. Each week, Girl Scouts meet in shelters across the city to take part in activities, make friends, earn badges, and learn leadership skills. Girl Scouts is a wonderful program, and my daughter and many of her friends from Elementary School gained a lot from being able to participate. I am so glad that this troop exists for girls who might not normally have that opportunity. If you would like to buy some cookies and have them shipped to you, you can do so here. If you don’t want…

  • Catching Up

    It looks like I took a little blog break there. I’m back today, and have a few minor tidbits to share. First off, this is the same beautiful magnolia/tulip tree that I shared with you a couple of weeks ago. It’s downtown, and likely the next time I walk around the area, it will be bare. We’re having rain again, after a very dry period, which is welcome, but I imagine will knock down most of these blooms. Saturday morning, Maya had an appointment to get her hair done. I dropped her off and then walked around our little downtown for awhile. I like to explore, and went down a…

  • Miscellaneous Monday

    I don’t know what to write about today, so I’m going to just throw a bunch of stuff at you. Here goes. Regarding the meme above, this is how I felt when we were in France last year. The names of the towns we stayed in were pronounced completely differently than they looked to my American eyes. Mougins is pronounced ‘MOO-jan‘ with a soft j, short a, and a soft n. Click the link to hear. Vincennes is a little closer to how it looks, VA-sen, with a short A. One of the stops on our train ride between Paris and Vincennes is Nation, pronounced NA-si-on, with all short vowels.…