The Substance
This weekend, Ted and I went to see The Substance, which is described as feminist body horror. I did not know that going in (and not being a big fan of horror movies, I wouldn’t know what that means). I just knew that it starred Demi Moore as an aging actress who finds a way to split her body into older and younger versions, something like that. Think The Picture of Dorian Gray, a Faustian bargain, etc. The Substance is one of the weirdest movies I’ve ever seen. Did you see and enjoy Boxing Helena? The Fly?* Crash (the super creepy 1996 movie, not the 2005 one with Sandra Bullock)? Do you like to be hit over the head with the messages of a film, even if you agree with it? (Hollywood destroys women! Drugs are addictive and bad! Living under the male gaze is exhausting and demoralizing!) Do you enjoy covering your eyes because what is being shown is ridiculously disturbing and disgusting? Again and again and again? (And again! For over 2 hours!) Do you think that David Lynch and Stanley Kubrick should get together and make movies? If so, this movie might be for you. I’m not sure it was for me. There were a couple of points when I wanted to leave, or for it to just end already.
There was one scene in the middle of the film when Demi Moore is getting ready to go out on a date, and she keeps going back to the mirror, second guessing herself, changing her makeup and so on. She clearly has lost whatever self confidence she once had, this amazingly talented, incredibly beautiful Oscar winning actress turned fitness guru, who has been pushed out of her entire identity and forgotten. As a woman of a certain age, I know how it feels to become invisible to much of society (though I have found it freeing, where it is her undoing.) That was amazingly well done and very thoughtful and moving.
Otherwise, the saving grace to The Substance was the final act, which was so incredibly ridiculous and so over the top (almost Monty Python) that we were in tears with laughter. Ted said his abs hurt from laughing so hard. I’m not sure whether that was intentional, but it saved it for us. Not recommended unless you have very specific taste in film.
* I liked The Fly. I saw it with my brother and he made fun of me because I cried at the end.
35 Comments
Birchie
Thank you for watching this so that I don’t have to! I admit I was curious about it. What I really want is for Demi Moore to make a reeeeeeally good movie – maybe this will get her back on the radar and get her cast in that movie.
J
I hope so! She has a lot of talent.
Maya
There’s a scene in the trailer where she rubs off her lipstick in a smear that deja-vu-ed me right back to that scene in _Indecent Proposal_ where Demi’s lipstick is rubbed off in a smear too! (I do want to watch this movie, but may wait until it’s streaming and watch from the comfort of my own home.)
I remember naively telling my boy-best-friend that I had a crush on Jeff Goldblum, and he thought it would be hilarious to make me watch _The Fly_. I don’t think I was able to finish the movie.
J
Oh, the ending is so sad Maya. He tries to separate himself from the fly by going through the machine again, and comes out mutated even more, even more of a fly. Geena Davis has to kill him to put him out of his misery, and she is sobbing the entire time. It’s kind of ridiculous, but I felt so badly for them that I cried.
Maya
We saw The Substance today! Your review was spot on! There was that one scene at the end that was very Shining-like and it reminded me of your comment about Kubrick…
J
Oh yay! Did you find yourself laughing hysterically after the last metamorphosis? OMG.
Maya
HAHAHA, You are so young at heart… My kids found it hilarious too.
I was too grossed out… and also that one reminded me of a baby somehow…
Ted
This movie was so over the top. How could we not laugh at the ridiculous level of gore and violence in the third act? It got worse and worse that it just sent me into fits of laughter. I remember when we saw “Total Recall” back in the day, and the comedic violence made me howl with laughter, too.
J
Thankfully we didn’t have to go back and see this one again the next day!
nance
I kept seeing references and stories about this film. Like you, I agree with its basic message. I don’t have any interest in seeing the movie, though–horror is not my genre, and I’m not big on Demi Moore. I think when she changed the ending of The Scarlet Letter for her film version was when I put her on my No Fly List.
You know how I feel about The Classics.
J
I confess to not having seen The Scarlet Letter. Let’s say that you saw it so I don’t have to, and I saw The Substance, so you don’t have to. Really, what are friends for?
NGS
Ha ha ha! How do you really feel about this movie, J? I am dying over here.
J
LOL Engie…it had its moments, but that third act just went off the rails.
Ernie
This movie does NOT appeal to me. I, too, am glad that you watched it so that I don’t have to. The image alone of her back all stitched up grosses me out. I do like the idea of dying laughing at the ending, but probably not worth seeing it just in order to see that part. I’ve never seen The Fly.
J
The back being stitched up is the LEAST of it, let me tell you. Steer clear if that is too gross.
Margaret
It doesn’t sound like my type of film; I’m not into horror much these days.
J
No, I’ve never been one for horror, and the ones I do like, I don’t like them to be gory!
Suzanne
HA! Your first paragraph cracked me up. Thank you for watching the movie so I can avoid it forever.
J
I live to serve.
Nicole MacPherson
Welp. That would be a no from me, dog.
J
I feel seen.
Melissa
This does not sound like my kind of movie and The Fly freaked me out when I saw it.
J
This is 15,000 times worse than The Fly.
Ally Bean
Thanks for the review. There’s no way I’ll be seeing this movie. I rarely see any movies, and never ones that are disturbing. I just can’t.
J
I’m pretty sure we would not have seen it if we had realized! So gross.
sustainablemum
I have definitely watched the Fly, think I have watch the Crash not sure about Boxing Helena. I am not much of a film watcher these days, and am not sure I would watch a horror movie, I think it would stop me sleeping. I loved them in my 20s. I am however intriged by the Substance but like Maya would only watch it from the comfort of my sofa.
J
It was overwhelmingly gross in the theater. I think in your own home might be better!
coco
my god, that pic is disturbing to start with. Would you recommend it to someone who doesn’t want any horror movie?
J
Hard NO Coco, this is defintitely a horror movie.
Jenny
Well, I’m weirdly intrigued (there must be something wrong with me.) The message behind it sounds really interesting. I’m also at the age where I’ve become “invisible” to a certain segment of society, but it doesn’t bother me. Appearance was never a big part of my identity (although I did and do care about it- we all do) and that definitely makes aging easier.
J
It’s just really graphic but of course it’s all fake. If you can get past that, and how the camera absolutely ogles the younger actress, there’s some good acting involved. You might be the audience they are looking for! I’m with you, becoming invisible has been a relief to me. Much better than being ogled or examined and dismissed.
Diane
Oh my goodness. I don’t think I can even get past that poster. I’m soooo squeamish. You can find me in my corner binge-watching Hallmark holiday movies.
J
I had my hair done today and tried to say how gross this movie was, but everyone wanted to go see it. Different strokes, I guess. I’m not a horror fan.
Tobia | craftaliciousme
This does NOT soudn like my kind of movie. But happy to hear you had a good laugh.
Kyria @ Travel Spot
Like many of the other commenters, that does not sound like my cup of tea! I don’t have an issue with blood or gore, but find myself liking things more when they have some substance (haha) rather than just being all action or all gore or all horror with no good plot.