Solo

Anxiety
The van flies,
rattles across
heavily potholed roads
bringing me closer
to my mother,
but it can’t catch
up to my brain,
which is speeding
past me.
Running
running fast
running past
shadows and
blurred trees
and before
and now
and if I could catch up
to my thoughts,
wrestle them
to the ground,
tame them inside
the cage
of my head,
I could breathe.
I could breathe
I COULD

Breathe, Blade. Breathe, Rutherford says, rubbing my head, and looking at me with eyes that care. It’s gonna be okay. Just breathe.

Solo is the story of Blade, a young man, just graduating from high school. His mother died when he was a child, and his father is a rock star, trying to regain his glory. His father is also frequently drunk or high, and does stupid, embarrassing things that make Blade vow to never be like his father. His sister, Storm, wants nothing more than to be just like her father, although thankfully, without the drugs and booze.

Blade finds refuge in the person of Chapel, his girlfriend. Due to his father’s behavior, Chapel is forbidden to see Blade, because her father fears that Blade will turn out just like his dad.

Blade is like his father in that he loves music, it defines him and gives shape to his life. The entire book is written in poems like the one quoted, above. He also writes songs, and there are a couple in the book. I was disappointed that the link that the book includes for you to listen to some of Blade’s songs does not work.  However, the Internet helped me out, and I found a video of one of the songs, performed by Randy Preston.

I really enjoyed this quick read, and was captured by the lyricism in the writing. I felt for Blade and his heartbreak, and found myself cheering him on in finding a way to heal.