Meme Monday
This isn’t truly a meme, but instead some words of wisdom that I gathered from my bloggy friend Roma 8 years ago, that she posted on Facebook. Does Roma still have a blog? I can’t find her old one, but honestly, I’m not even sure how to look. Should have kept her on the sidebar maybe, but then again, if I removed it it was likely because she wasn’t maintaining it anymore.
ANYWAY, the message is timely and one that I try to keep in mind, especially during the holidays. Resist everything except what your heart dictates. If it makes you happy to polish the silver, go for it. If it makes you happy to seek out and buy perfect presents for your family and/or friends, do that. But if those things stress you out? Blow them off. Take a deep breath. Slow down. You are enough.
A lot of people talk about de-cluttering their houses, going for a more minimalist vibe. I think we need to de-clutter our minds, and our holidays, so there isn’t so much pressure, and so much room for disappointment if things don’t turn out exactly as we had hoped.
12 Comments
Elisabeth
Yes, yes, yes! I love reminders like this and have tried to move my mind (and my home) in this direction. What do I really want? What truly brings joy? What can I do in this moment that aligns with my values? What can I do in this moment to bring a burst of pleasure to my day?
Lighting candles, taking a walk, sitting on the couch and doing nothing.
I’ve written several blog posts over the last year about “Good Things I Don’t Have To Do” – and it really does help me to define that things might be popular with others (an Elf on the Shelf, matching Christmas jammies, making gingerbread houses) that don’t bring me joy.
Also, it’s okay to do less. Make one veggie to go with Christmas dinner instead of 3. Wrap all gifts in gift bags instead of wrapping paper. Buy less. Do less. Enjoy more?
It’s definitely a balance – and to me, part of what I enjoy about Christmas can be the “excesses” – having 3 kinds of cookies in the freezer, or having an overflowing stocking – but I need to learn to stop when it stops being fun and joyful.
And I love how you finish the post: I think we need to de-clutter our minds, and our holidays, so there isn’t so much pressure, and so much room for disappointment if things don’t turn out exactly as we had hoped.
That last bit is SO true. When we scale back on things, there is so much less room for disappointment. Such an interesting – and true! – point.
J
Thank you Elisabeth! I saw your post about elf on a shelf and such, and then this memory popped up for me on Facebook, and it really resonated with me. I enjoy Christmas, Hanukkah, Thanksgiving, all of it. I’m a work in progress, which means I still sometimes do too much. I need to continue my work on letting go of some of that desire to do more.
Ally Bean
Yep, de-cluttering your mind during December is brilliant advice. I refer to this time of year as the time of Forced Frivolity. It’s easy to get caught up in the clutter, physical and emotional, of the season.
J
It really is easy, and I like your term, ‘Forced Frivolity’. As though this can’t be a difficult time, or hell, just an average time of year.
San
Very wise words. It’s good to let go of expectations and think about what we REALLY want from the holidays.
J
Thanks San, yes, that is exactly it.
Jenny
Yes, I want to de-clutter the holidays and my mind. Most of the things I do, I do because I really love them… but there are a few holiday “traditions” I’d like to get rid of (decorating gingerbread houses comes to mind.). Great post!
J
Jenny, both you and Elisabeth have mentioned the gingerbread houses. I don’t think I have ever done that, and I used to feel kind of guilty about it, because my daughter wanted to but it seemed like such a mess to me. She finally got to do it in High School at a December birthday party. Whew! I guess I dodged a bullet.
nance
So true and so important, especially in this Age Of Social Media where everything is staged, filtered, and curated. I lead a Real Life.
J
Nance, you are right, social media can really contribute a lot to a sense that one is not bringing their A game. Total BS.
Margaret
December isn’t my favorite month: the pressure of the holidays, many loved ones’ deaths, my anniversary with my late husband, etc. I’m a terrible gift giver and refuse to be jolly! Just call me Scrooge? 😉
J
I agree, the pressure can be too much. I’m sorry about the deaths and the anniversary, all are painful reminders. I wouldn’t call you a Scrooge. Hang in there, January will be here before you know it.