Life’s Still Sweet and Sour
One of Maya’s high school classmates was murdered last week. She was 19 years old, home for the summer after her first year of college, an engineering student in San Diego. She was bright, well liked by so many, a star on the High School track team. Her whole life ahead of her. An ex boyfriend from several years ago rang her doorbell before 7 am, and shot her, then shot himself. I think her parents were there and saw her die. She was not a close friend of Maya’s, but she liked her, and it’s so damned shocking and horrible and makes me think ugly thoughts, like, “If you’re suicidal, be decent and don’t take anyone else out with you”, which of course is cruel in its own way, and makes no sense, because clearly the ex-boyfriend (Stanford, engineering student, 2 years older) was out of his mind with something. And a better, more charitable thought is just wishing he weren’t in so much pain to begin with, or that he had gotten all of the help he needed. The young woman’s mother is a Nurse Practitioner at Maya’s doctor’s office, and has cared for her several times. I don’t know her well, but it hits too close to home.
Ted’s uncle died last week. I’ve never met this uncle, but he lived with Ted and his family for awhile when Ted was 19 or 20, and he liked him a lot. He was a good man, well loved by the family. He was far too young to die. It’s a shock to the family. It’s upsetting and sad and Ted’s dad has to deal with the first loss of a sibling. He comes from a large family, so he’s not alone by any means. But gah.
You know what? Skip the sweet. I’ll get there, but this one is just sour.
7 Comments
Ted
Too much death! The murder-suicide in Walnut Creek is such a puzzler because the two hadn’t been dating for over a year.
The death of Robin is so sad because, well, he’s family! He was a great guy who was very private, but always very friendly toward me.
Shalinie
Sympathies to you all for the loss of your Uncle. Please pass on my thoughts and prayers to your Mom and Dad xx
Rain Trueax
The fear of an ex boyfriend or somebody who wanted to be a boyfriend or so many scenarios where a guy just shoots a woman down, is definitely one of mine having a granddaughter in that age where the wrong boyfriend can be so disastrous 🙁 So sorry about this
Dad Who Writes
Awful, just awful. Like you say, what could have been done to save him (and her) before things got so bad?
Ally Bean
My condolences.
I wonder what the rest of the story is with the murder/suicide. It’s troubling and pointless. I cannot imagine the pain that the parents are going through. Mental health issues + guns = nothing good ever.
I’m sorry to learn about Ted’s uncle. You’ve had quite an unsettling month, haven’t you?
Nance
I’m sorry, J. When a shocking death like that of Maya’s classmate occurs, it is very unsettling. There is so little sense to it that it makes you feel vulnerable and a little helpless, too. No one can know what he was thinking; I guess he wasn’t really thinking at all.
It’s also sad and a little jarring when summer is zipping along and your family notifies you of a death. You’ve all been enjoying the weather, having great food and going to nice places, and all of a sudden, there is such sad and serious news. It’s such a dose of perspective and reality.
Again, I’m very sorry.
Gina
Oh Julie, I am so sad to hear of all your losses in such a brief time!
I am sorry and I hope you and Ted and Maya can heal. 🙁