Happy Birthday Maya!

Sometimes it seems that the time is flowing so quickly, and that I don’t know how we got from that very first day, with its fear and pain (labor), as well as its joy and exultation (baby), to today, when our beloved daughter is 15 years old!  It has thus far been an amazing ride, watching Maya grow from a sweet, dependent baby, to a sweet, strong, thoughtful, intelligent, caring, beautiful girl. She truly is our dream come true, and we could not wish for anything more.

I remember those baby wishes, before we had her, before I was pregnant.  I had it bad.  I wanted a baby so much, someone to cuddle and hold and care for.  I used to cry sometimes on Mother’s Day, because I wanted so very much to be a mother myself.  But we weren’t ready…we were still in college, not yet married, and so we had to wait.  Maybe, for some of us, there’s something about finding the man who you know is the one, who will be an amazing father, a loving husband, a true best friend and partner in crime, that puts these hormones into high drive, and makes you want to see what kind of wonderful babies you might have together.  Or maybe, perhaps, I would have suffered these pangs anyway.  I don’t know. What I do know is that I suffered mightily, all the while trying to pace myself and enjoy the time and space that I was in.  Enjoy college and my friends there.  Enjoy being engaged, and then being a newlywed.  The freedom of being a childless couple is a wonderful thing, and I highly recommend it to everyone, at least for awhile.  The freedom to stay up late, sleep in late, spend your money on things you want, have fancy dinners, hear each other speak…it’s romance, and it’s a wonderful way to spend your life.  Until that baby lust raises its head, and will not be ignored.  If you want a baby as badly as I did (and Ted, he wanted children quite a lot, I’m just not sure it was a physical ache like it was for me…), then sooner or later you look around at the life that you’re living and say, “I like this, I like this a lot.  But wouldn’t it be even nicer with a baby to share it with?  Someone to raise and tell our stories to, someone to love and support and adore, the way our parents raised and loved and supported and adored us?”  And if the answer is yes, a resounding yes, then you do whatever you have to do to have a baby, or two, or three…For us, it was easy.  I got pregnant disgracefully quickly, had a healthy pregnancy with a minimum of scares, and a short, relatively easy childbirth.  (Relatively easy, because it was still the hardest thing I’ve ever done, physically, and it hurt.  A LOT.  But it was only 4 hours, start to finish.) For others, it’s adoption, or many tries at pregnancy, or surrogates.  For some, it is a dream never realized.  And then, there are many others who have no desire to have children of their own, who are completely satisfied to spend their lives as a couple, or as a single.  They are happier that way, and gosh, kids are a lot of work, and a lot of money, so if you don’t HAVE to do it, with all of your heart, then I say, take a pass.

For us, there was no real option.  We needed a baby.  And we have enjoyed and felt grateful for her every day, from the first knowledge that I was pregnant, through the birth and colic and sleepless nights, to the toddler years, preschool, off to elementary school…see how things just start speeding up?  I wonder how much of that has to do with sleep?  The first weeks you have your baby, no one sleeps, and those weeks zoom by in a haze, which is singular in that at the same time it’s zooming by, it feels endless.  Now that Maya would happily sleep until noon most days (and sometimes does), we’re getting more sleep, and the time seems to be speeding up, and I’m losing track of one month to the next, sometimes one year to the next.

I couldn’t imagine my life as being nearly as happy without you, Maya.  Having you was the best decision your father and I ever made (except for perhaps getting married), and you are so very loved and dear to us both.  Happy Birthday, darling girl.   And for a glimpse at a few of the moments between those early days and today, check out Ted’s Birthday slideshow!