Friday Randomness
This week has felt pretty blah. I’ve felt pissy and grumpy, which is ridiculous because the weather has been truly lovely here (sorry to those of you still in the depth of winter). But it’s also not at all ridiculous, because there’s just so much bullshit going on, and it’s wearing on me. I don’t want to ‘fake it till you make it’, I don’t want to let the motherfuckers steal my joy, but I do want to stay engaged and find comfort in my family, and in making what difference I can. Engie had a great post yesterday, about how she’s feeling like crap and stressed out and how it feels disingenuous to post about books and so on in times like these. I FEEL YOU SISTER! There’s a line we have to find between toxic positivity and letting the bastards win. I think of toxic positivity as burying your head in the sand and pretending that everything is OK, that it WILL be OK, when we know that it is not, and that for many of us, it WILL NOT. I am not interested in that. But also, seeking these bits of joy have been helpful for my mental health, because the BS is stressful and if I climb in bed and don’t get out, I won’t be here to fight the fight. And fight we must. We all have to find our own way of doing that. If for you it means that you don’t post as often, do that. If it means you only post about the bullshit that’s going on, do that. If it’s that you write your regular blog post and have a BS of the day section, do that. Find your way. My way is to talk about the BS and also look for glimmers. So, here are the glimmers of light that I found for Elisabeth’s FIG challenge.
Saturday – A lovely walk with Ted and Maya. Did some shopping and cooking in preparation for a party. Ted made a delicious lamb curry and his amazing roti, and I made some curried pumpkin.
Sunday – My BIL’s birthday party! We had a lovely time celebrating Ted’s brother’s birthday. We had the lamb and pumpkin (it’s actually butternut squash, but my MIL calls it pumpkin, because in Guyana they have a type of pumpkin they use for this recipe) and we picked up rice and dal from a local restaurant. There were samosas, chocolate cake, and lots of wine. It was a good time.
Monday – It was Maya’s turn to cook, and she made tasty chicken/fake chicken tacos. Thanks to Suzanne for the link for the recipe, which in our house (since we don’t have a slow cooker) means simmering chicken in this green salsa, then making soft shell tacos from it. It’s become a go-to dish on Maya’s night, which is fine with me.
Also, I know it’s mean to be glad about this, but I was happy to see tickets on 3 cars parked illegally in the 5 minute parking zone in front of our neighboring apartment complex. On my walk in the morning, I saw that the cars were all there with frosted windshields (here that doesn’t happen quickly, so they had been there all night). A car was double parked in front of them, trying to make a ride share pick up, and a car leaving our complex had to go into the oncoming traffic lane to get past. This is what we do not want. The three cars were still there when I came back, so I called the Sheriff and requested a car come and enforce the parking regulations. When I went out later to run my errands, all 3 cars had tickets. What else. I started the very enjoyable audio book, The Flatshare, suggested by Diane (and Engie in D’s comments).
Tuesday – I enjoyed the beautiful blossoms of the tulip trees in our neighborhood. I finished the very enjoyable The Blue Castle for Engie’s CBBC. I did NOT want to do my strength training or my yoga this morning, just wanted to do nothing. Got it all done anyway. Wrote my postcards to voters in Wisconsin. Watched The Bachelor, which is dumb but at least he sent whatshername home, so that’s something.
Wednesday – I finished The Flatshare and discovered that there is a TV series based on the book, with Jessica Brown Findlay (Lady Sybil from Downton Abbey). I thought I might give it a try, but it’s not available in the US. I watched the trailer and I thought, “Nah, I don’t need to see that”, so it’s OK. I made my phone calls, this time regarding the damned budget that passed the house and the fact that the US is siding with frikkin North Korea and Russia against Ukraine. I’m depressed that the budget passed, but heartened by the tenacity of folks like Congresswoman Pettersen flying from Colorado with her infant to vote against it after that asshat Mike Johnson refused to let her vote remotely. Family values, right? Jackass.
My day to volunteer with the cat rescue that places cats in local pet food stores for adoption is Friday, but the Wednesday person is dealing with some pretty serious health issues, so I’ve been covering for her when there are cats. Guess who is at my location right now? That’s right, Ainsling, the 23.5 lb calico! She’s so loving, and I feel bad because she’s so overweight she has trouble getting up. I hope she gets a good home soon and can live a healthier life. I feel bad for her, I know she must be confused and scared since her person died.
We’ve had Amazon Prime for years, and I shop at Whole Foods probably 3 times a month (sometimes more, sometimes less). I enjoy getting 5 points per dollar using my Prime Visa. I’ve felt like a hypocrite because Bezos is such an ass, but I save money and it’s convenient. The news that he is limiting the editorial page of the Washington Post to ‘personal liberties and free markets’ was the proverbial straw, and I cancelled my Prime membership. I order Maya’s Nespresso pods via Amazon, they don’t sell them in the Nespresso store (she likes the Starbucks Blonde variety). Good news, they sell them online at Costco! They’re more than at Amazon, but I’m going to have to get used to that. At least they’re less than at the grocery store.
Thursday – Another ‘use it or lose it’ day of PTO, so I took the day off from work. It was a rest day for strength training, which I really wanted because weights are so frikken boring. Teeny tiny glimmer today was when I was doing my yoga, and Adriene asked Benji to move and he grumbled at her. It made me laugh, I pink puffy heart Benji. I rewound it and watched that part again. After yoga, I went for a walk, and I decided to go to one of our local parks. I stopped and visited the rose garden, and I sat on what I think of as Mulder’s bench. This is because on Mulder’s last day, Maya and I drove him to the park, and we had a slow walk, and then we sat with him on the ground near the bench and let him eat grass. He was not feeling well, you could tell that he was very uncomfortable. But he enjoyed being there with us, which was lovely. Today I saw turtles in the pond, and then some different turtles on the drain in the middle of a different pond. I saw daffodils blooming, and a tiny new tulip tree (magnolia) that was not much more than a single stick coming up out of the earth, yet it had a blossom.
After my walk, I decided to do some gardening. I have this pot of African Lilies (Agapanthus) and it looks horrible, water logged and half dead. It hasn’t bloomed in years. It always looks like this in the winter, until I pull away all of the dead leaves, then they come back nicely but it doesn’t bloom. So I went to Costco and got a bunch of potting soil, and took the plant out of the pot, broke it up (separated the bulbs and roots), and repotted it with some rocks to help with drainage. I suspect that it may be the kind that dies off every winter, so perhaps this is normal, but I would like it to bloom. This was a LOT of work, it was really difficult to get the plant out of that big pot, so I was a bit worn out after. I had more gardening to do, but I decided that it was going to have to wait for another day.
I got cleaned up, then took myself over to a local pub and had a glass of wine while I wrote postcards to voters – this time to Minnesota voters, who have a special election coming up. I brought my stamps with me and mailed them on my way home.
Someone had written this cheerful note on the sidewalk on the way home.
Friday – Payday is Yayday, so that’s a good thing. I have the day off for my Fabulous Friday, and after I visit the cat rescue, I am going to lunch/dinner with my friend this afternoon, which is against the No Spend Blackout, but I worry about how 3 No Spend days in a 7 week period, all on Fridays, might affect small locally owned restaurants. (The graphic above does not mention future blackouts, originally I had one that includes 3 in the next 7 weeks, but I replaced it because bunny = cute.) So I’m going to one of the small, locally owned restaurants in our town, and I’m paying cash to avoid giving the credit card company any money. As for Walmart, I’ve never liked that place and have only been a handful of times in my life. Amazon makes me sad to give up, as does Target, but I will do both as much as possible unless they change their ways. I’m going to have to find a new place to buy inexpensive postcards for ‘postcards to voters’.
Maya had this quote in her comments, that I found motivating and like something that we all need to hear (especially Congress):
“Do not obey in advance. Most of the power of authoritarianism is freely given. In times like these, individuals think ahead about what a more repressive government will want, and then offer themselves without being asked. A citizen who adapts in this way is teaching power what it can do. Anticipatory obedience is a political tragedy. Perhaps rulers did not initially know that citizens were willing to compromise this value or that principle. Perhaps a new regime did not at first have the direct means of influencing citizens one way or another. After the German elections of 1932, which brought Nazis into government, or the Czechoslovak elections of 1946, where communists were victorious, the next crucial step was anticipatory obedience. Because enough people in both cases voluntarily extended their services to the new leaders, Nazis and communists alike realized that they could move quickly toward a full regime change. The first heedless acts of conformity could not then be reversed.” ~ Timothy Snyder, On Tyranny.
I bought these lovely flowers at Costco last week, and apparently they are thirsty flowers. I came downstairs and they were so sad and droopy! There was no water in the vase, they drank it all. I think we all feel like this sometimes, perhaps definitely more lately. Luckily, after I gave them some water, they recovered nicely. Give yourselves water, my friends.
41 Comments
Anvilcloud
I have a post coming out a bit later in which I also speak of Prime and WMart. It is difficult to avoid both, especially Prime, but we’ll do what we can.
We keep on as best we can.
J
AC, EXACTLY. We all must do our best, and we mustn’t sell ourselves short and say “I can’t do that”, but we also have to realize our limitations. As they say, this is a marathon, not a sprint.
Ally Bean
I posted that wonderful meme on IG this morning. Hoping to remind more people of the importance of taking a stand against the oligarchy. Happy to see it here, too.
A 23.5 lb calico cat? Oh my, that’s a large cat. I thought our cats were heavy at 15 lbs, but I was wrong.
You write postcards to voters. You’re the second blogger who has mentioned doing that. I’ve never received a postcard from a stranger trying to influence me politically, but do get letters from strangers trying to get me to become a conservative Chrisitan.
J
I’m glad to hear that you are getting the word out about the economic blackout.
I asked the rescue folks how much they think this sweet cat SHOULD way, and they said about 14 lbs. So she’s a big cat to begin with, but weighs about 75% more than she should.
If you’ve never gotten a postcard about voting, it’s because you are a person who votes! I think they pick lists of registered Democrats who have not voted in a while. It would be a waste of a stamp to send a postcard to someone who is already voting, I think. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten a letter trying to convince me to be a conservative Christian. By the voting logic, that would mean that they know I’m ALREADY a conservative Christian, which clearly I am not.
Ally Bean
Your reasoning about the postcards makes sense. I cannot explain the letter situation either. I have no idea how my name is on those lists. Another mystery of life.
Don’t know if you care, but your replies to my comments aren’t coming through the WP system so I’m checking back in by returning here. No big deal, but unusual. ????
J
Ally, yes, I care, but I have no idea how to fix it. I keep trying! I assume you check the box saying ‘notify me via email if anyone answers my comment’.
Ally Bean
No I don’t ever check that box anywhere for anyone. I trust the WP system to notify me within the system. I can’t deal with more email. Please tell me that’s not the direction WP is going in! I don’t know why commenting has become so difficult for us. It’s THE topic everywhere I turn. Remember back 20 years ago when blogging was new and we all stayed in touch so easily… *sigh*
J
Oh, gotcha. I never think to look at the back end for comments on other blogs. I will poke around there and see if I can figure it out.
I get notified via email of your replies to my comments on your blog, which is why I assumed that is what you were talking about. Let me investigate!
Jenny
Love your first paragraph, and I loved Engie’s post. I guess most of us are grappling with how to reconcile our cheery “fig” posts (and all the usual topics- cats, books, etc.) with what’s going on in our country. I agree- everyone needs to find their own way. I’ll read it all!
Okay, I’m going to need an update on Ainsling. If I were there I would scoop her up immediately (of course, if I were there I would apparently have 20 cats, since I say that about every cat you talk about.) Calicos are usually VERY affectionate, so I can imagine how loving she is. But oof, that’s pretty big! LIke Ally, I thought our cats were heavy… i hope Ainsling gets adopted soon.
Enjoy your day! Friday is usually our takeout night, but we won’t be having Chipotle today. I’m trying to figure out if we’re going to just eat at home, or get dinner from a local Thai place. Like you, I don’t want the small businesses to suffer. Well- also I like Thai food and we haven’t had it in a while : )
J
I too hope Ainsling gets a new home quickly! She’s so sweet, and her life has changed so dramatically lately. Poor darling. I hear you on wanting to adopt them. I don’t think I could volunteer with dogs, or we would have a house full.
Enjoy your Thai if you go that way! Sounds like a perfect way to support DEI to me.
PocoBrat
Just in AWE of you at the moment, J: you canceled your Prime membership; you’re writing postcards to voters in WI and MN; you gardened; you resusscitated flowers; you contributed to an amazing menu for a birthday party; you had a Mulder moment, you volunteered at the cat shelter, you took yourself out for a glass of wine… and so many other things ON TOP Of your regular work and daily workouts?! Go you! I hope you have a wonderful time with your friend today.
And thanks for sharing the Rep. Peterson story, which I missed–I will share that with students next week.
J
Thank you Maya! I will admit that today I am feeling decidedly less grumpy. I think the long walk and the gardening yesterday helped. And the glass of wine. 😉
NGS
Thanks for addressing some of the things in my post. I have really struggled with what tone to take with regard to the crumbling of democracy in this country. But it IS good for my mental health to look for the bright lights and FIGs. So I continue on.
I am a voter in Wisconsin! I obviously need a postcard sent my way! (Just kidding. They never send me postcards because I am as reliable as Hannah trying to chase a squirrel up a tree.
When I do postcard campaigns, the local Dem office provides the postcards. I had no idea you were over there providing your own! I feel like this is something I can definitely help with!
J
Engie, I know, it’s been really difficult to find the balance for me too. I do like not letting the motherfuckers win, though, so I keep on looking for those glimmers.
I think postcards for voters has an option where you can request postcards and stamps, and they will send them to you, but the idea is that’s only if you can’t afford them, because of course it costs THEM money that way. So I buy my own. I did a search for the National Parks postcards that I bought last time and have enjoyed using, which I got on Amazon. I can buy them elsewhere, for either a little more or a little less, but of course I will have to pay for shipping, which I did not as a Prime member, so that sucks. But likely that is what I will do. In a perfect world I would find a box of postcards at a small independent book store, but I know that would be spendy. I mean, there are limits.
Margaret
I love your balanced blogging and how you’re looking for comfort while still fighting against what’s happening in our country. I knew it would be awful, but not this catastrophic. Perhaps I couldn’t allow myself to believe it? The bright spots are there and we need to enjoy them while not covering up the crap (insert stronger word) with toxic positivity.
J
Yes, we knew it would be bad, but the current shitstrom is horrifying nonetheless. UGH!
Nicole MacPherson
Wow, look at the difference the water makes! It’s a metaphor for everything, I think. I’m so impressed with you – you are getting shit done!!!! And finding little joys along the way. Well done you!
J
Thanks Nicole! Yes, the flowers with water really felt so symbolic this week.
Elisabeth
What an inspiring post! I agree with Nicole that the watering image stands for so much right now.
You knocked the FIG finding out of the park this week.
I know I won’t offend you if I post one of my FIGs from today. I am so thankful I am Canadian. I’ve just spent the last hour sitting gobsmacked watching what happened today in the Oval Office and I immediately got this huge swell of national pride. I know we’re small and perhaps not always mighty, but times like this make me so proud to call Canada my home! Another of my FIGs was watching Zelensky choose the high road. I cannot imagine the fortitude it takes to respond this way but my respect for him grows with each passing, horrible, war-filled day.
J
Of course I am not offended, just ashamed that this is where we are. On my way to meet my friend, just after hearing about the shit show in the Oval Office, I was so depressed. Trying to find my way back from that because I wanted to have a good day, and I felt like, “Really Julie? Are you Nero while Rome burns?” CRAP! So horrible, I can’t believe this is where we are, and I shudder to think that this is what we mean to the world.
Lisa’s Yarns
The state of the world is so freaking depressing. I talk about it all the dang time at work so I do not mention much on my blog because I just need a space where it’s not front and center. That doesn’t mean it’s not weighing on me, though. I watched the video of the exchange between Zelensky, Trump and Vance and I am so ashamed of our country. I truly believe that most people would not support the way that situation was handled but no one will speak up because Trump has an endless piggy bank in the form of Elon Musk to use as retribution. So I guess we need a lot of people who have no f’s to give who are willing to lose their seat to stand up for what is right. What I really want more than anything is campaign finance reform. I’ve thought a lot about how to solve the situation and that’s the only path forward. In my opinion. We need to get the big donors out of our elections! That includes private companies!
I love the picture of you having a glass of wine outdoors! It makes me miss wine! I haven’t posted about this yet, but I’ve decided to make 2025 mostly dry for a variety of reasons. I did find a restaurant that had NA Sauvignon Blanc, though, so I had a wine-like drink at dinner last month.
My big figs were our gorgeous weather and spending today with Paul. I failed on the black out but didn’t shop at the most problematic places. I spent money at rain forest cafe, LEGO, Sephora, and a local grocery store chain but I failed to use cash. I did get a latte at SBUX but used my points to pay for it.
J
You hit the nail on the head Lisa, the only way out of this is to prohibit all contributions and have elections paid for by government funding. Not one dollar from anyone. Or, a small donation limit, like $250 per person, and NOTHING from corporations. As it is now, our government is for sale, and it’s difficult for any individual to stand up against that.Which is our fault as an uninvolved and ignorant electorate. So frikkin depressing.
Ernie
She had to fly in with her newborn to vote? What is wrong with people? I hate Walmart and have no problem avoiding it. I am baffled by the constant presence of the Elon dude. 100% this is self serving his business interests. Can’t that be proven? Or am I being too Pollyana? That poor cat. I once had a toddler in my daycare like that- um, not Calico but not fed a healthy diet. Like quite the opposite and it was sad. The doc finally told the parents and they had to send him with salads for his lunch. He was 3 years old! and he tried to pick the bacon bits out of the salads. The birthday party sounds festive and fun. Hooray for that and for a day off of work.
J
Oh that toddler story makes me sad! Poor kid.
Yeah, it’s obvious that Musk is lining his own pockets, cutting agencies that regulate his businesses. The problem is that no one in power cares.
Tobia | craftaliciousme
Congrats on foregoing amazon. I am not that strong willed. Specially since all my english books are cheapest and most available here. Sigh. And it is so damn convinient.
All other stores ar enot in Germany so I guess I am already doing a lot. HA!
Could you print the postcards yourself? If they are all the same it could be the cheepest option. or you could make more than you need and then give them away to poeple who want to join in?
J
Thanks Tobia,
Interesting thought about making my own. Something to consider.
Melissa
We woke up to the news on Saturday morning of the shit show in the White House and to be honest that spiked my anxiety. I mean, cutting Europe loose most likely means Europe needs to increase their nuclear deterrent, which is just what we need in the world—more nuclear weapons. I hope our government wrote into the AUKUS agreement a clause to get a refund on our $159 billion investment in US shipbuilding if the US reneges on their part of the agreement. We just paid our first $800M installment. ?? Although, clearly, agreements mean nothing to the current administration.
Luckily, we had my son’s engagement party yesterday, so I didn’t have a chance to ruminate, and I had a great day. I’m impressed with your work trying to get people to vote. You need compulsory voting like us so that the extremes don’t hijack your elections. I bet yuo were glad the flowers perked up with a bit of love, yay.
J
Yes, when only 2/3 of eligible voters show up, there are problems. I hope that AU and other partners can put the squeeze on the Asshole in Chief to let him know that the world does not want a US that partners with North Korea and Russia. It’s depressing as hell.
I’m glad you had such a joyous occasion to celebrate and take your mind off of it all!
Kyria @ Travel Spot
I feel like you could go to Chinatown and get a bunch of San Francisco PCs for fairly cheap, although then you would have to get there, and they may buy them from Amazon anyway. You could maybe buy them on Etsy? I am actually amazed at how expensive PCs can be. I swear we used to buy them when traveling and they were like 10 for a dollar but now sometimes they are a dollar each. Is this just a sign that I am getting older or is inflation really that bad?
J
I looked on Etsy and may end up going that way, but the shipping charges make them kind of spendy. I mean, not horrible, but not 10 cents each either. I have to figure it out, whether I print photos at CVS and use those, print them somehow on my computer (though with the price of printer ink and stock paper, that may not be best) or buy them directly from the manufacturer and pay the shipping (similar to Etsy). There are some cute ones on Etsy though!
nance
You are a dynamo and a superhero. Thank you for all you do. I love that you took your Activism Tasks with you to the pub and completed them there in the sunshine with a glass of good wine.
I am envious still of your springtime weather and duties. We are getting a few snow showers here this morning, but thankfully, it isn’t accumulating significantly. What I wouldn’t give to be able to start gardening! My herb garden is a sad and pitiful mess.
As far as the sad and pitiful mess the felon rapist and his amour are making of things, I honestly don’t have the strength to write about any of it. I feel so assailed, so inundated, so outraged, and so aghast that I’m on overload. I’m sure my readers know where I stand; I’ve made my politics clear from Day One twenty years ago. Like you, I have resumed being a Political Activist, devoting time each day to writing letters, signing petitions, making phone calls, etc. The fact that we’re here again makes me sick.
I need Spring. It will help me so much to restore some balance.
J
Thank you Nance! I also appreciate your activism! I always intend to do something every day, but it turns into maybe 4 days a week, which is still better than nothing, right?
We have a Tesla dealership downtown, so I’m thinking next Saturday we join the group protesting there, and then treat ourselves with a nice lunch after. Win-win.
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Suzanne
I loved Engie’s post and I loved your response above. You are SO inspiring, doing all the work of phone calls and postcards.
Is it weird that I feel deeply invested in your agapanthus now? I really hope your hard work results in some blooms!
J
Me too! I’m worried that I manhandled it too much and maybe killed it. Time will tell!
Stephany
Julie, I really needed this post and all of the comments because I finally sat down to watch what happened on Friday (I knew it would raise my blood pressure and I needed to be in the right headspace) and I am feeling very, very frightened. HOW are we the country that is siding with RUSSIA of all people in this war? It’s unconscionable. And it’s only been 6 weeks, which is even harder to stomach. We have FOUR YEARS of this (if we’re lucky).
Okay, I need to bring my blood pressure down again and photos of Ainsling will help! What a beauty, even if she’s a CHONK. Whew. I’m feeling better about 16-lb Lila now. 😉
J
I haven’t watched it Stephany, I can’t. I know what was done, I’ve heard excerpts. Now he’s trying to take away our freedom of assembly. I fear martial law is next.
Daria
Thank you so much for a lovely post-card. I received it on Sunday, and it warmed my heart. The state of the world is despicable right now. My dad is happy since he is Putin’s supporter, and I can only stay on the phone with him for about 10 minutes max so I that I don’t tell him off. We stick to topics like weather and his grandkids.
Those flowers are lovely, glad to hear that they perked up. A small joy <3
J
Oh goodness, that has to be hard with your dad! I struggle with friends and family who are unconvinced of the danger we are in. It’s hard right now. I’m glad the postcard brightened your day!
Anne
Julie – thank you for this post, for balancing the figs with the, well, major challenges we in the US are facing. I so appreciate your efforts to get out the vote here in WI. We MUST win this S.C. race, particularly now that M*** has decided to interfere. I just…. Sigh. I feel so much despair on a daily basis, and then I escape into a book or a blog post, and I think, how am I helping? But I am showing up to vote, I am trying to support those who are out there Doing the Work. It just feels like, well, not much of anything right now. So thank you for showing up, for doing the work, for living your values. I aspire to be more like you, my friend. <3
J
Sometimes it’s more difficult to be there and do the things than other times. I’m at a time and place in my life where it works for me. And I also really enjoy disappearing into a book or a TV show or a blog post (or comments!)