Day of the Dead
Sorry for the Bonus Post, but I thought I would share the little poster that I put together for Day of the Dead today. This year’s additions are my Great Aunt Flo, who died in early October at the age of 100, and my boy Mulder, who died last year. I didn’t do any sort of altar last year, so just adding him now.
I did not grow up with Day of the Dead, I think the first time it occurred to me to do an altar was in 2017 after my Dad died. But I like it. I think of all of these loved ones many times a year, some every day. But to think of them all, honor them all together. I like it.
Here we have (L-R, top to bottom) Genevieve (Keeshond Sheltie mix, 1998 – 2012), Grandma Wells (on horseback as a girl, looking like a badass, 1916 – 2015), Pops (Ted’s father 1922 – 1993), my Dad (1943 – 2017), Great Aunt Flo (in the middle – 1924 – 2024), Samantha (way over on the right, small photo, my childhood dog, black lab/st. bernard mix 1972 – 1988) Grandma Ward (in 1955 I think – 1923 – 2016), My parents in 1987 (Mom – 1942 – 2008), Mulder, my puppy boy Keeshond (2015 – 2023 Fuck Cancer) and Lura, Ted’s sister (1959 – 2021 Fuck Cancer).
Life gets more poignant as we get older, right?
28 Comments
San
In Germany, November 1 is a holiday (All Saint’s Day) to commemorate the dead – so I guess it’s similar to Day of the Dead. I never put together an altar/collage but I actually love that you have a poster with all of the loved ones that are no longer with us. <3
J
November 1 is All Saints Day, November 2 is All Souls Day, and Day of the Dead is related to both. I choose to leave my collage up for both days, it feels soothing somehow.
Tobia | craftaliciousme
It is so interesting how religious background is influenced in this. Nov 1 is nothing to me living in the north eastern and hence protestant part of Germany. We “celebrate” Eternity Sunday or Sunday of the Death teh Sunday before advent starts.
I always make sure to be at the country home close to my grandparents graves. I clean them up on the Saturday before and then visit on Sunday. i often drive to my other grandparents graves who are an hour drive away and invite myself at my aunts or meet up with her at the cemetary. Often i do this with my mom. That weekend has a special place in my hear. I use it to reflect and be on my own.
i guess i dont have a physical altar but some sort of altar all the same.
All that said I love your version and how you commemorate the dead.
J
I like how you celebrate your grandparents by visiting their graves. It’s so peaceful at cemeteries.
Stephany
This is a beautiful tribute to those you have lost. <3
J
Thank you Stephany!
nance
J, I love the way you gather in the holidays and rituals that are significant to you and celebrate/observe them.
Your heart is vast and massive. Your love is fierce and tenacious.
I’m so glad I know you.
J
Oh Nance, that choked me up, thank you! <3
Margaret
That is a lovely tribute. I think the holiday is an important way to acknowledge our losses and remember our late loved ones.
J
Thank you Margaret!
Jenny
This is so nice! I was vaguely aware that yesterday was Day of the Dead but I was so distracted by everything else that was going on. It would have been nice to slow down a little and pay tribute, like you did.
J
I think it’s a two day celebration, Jenny, so if you get a chance, you can still do it today!
Meike
It’s a wonderful tradition remembering your loved ones. It’s so interesting to see all the diferent ways people do it. I like to look back at my old picture books and talk about my mom and grandparents with my kids.
J
I love that! Yes, it’s interesting to see all of the different ways people honor those who are gone.
Karen Meg
Julie that is so lovely. We have photos but not all gathered together. My mom has a spot for my dad’s photo in her solarium and my grandmother had of my grandfather and uncle who passed before I was born. We lost my aunt last April, it’s been over a year. Chinese tradition has us visit my dad’s grave, plant flowers and bow in respect every year and this year we added my aunt to the route. We do it with Mom, my family and my siblings’ families. This past summer I did a road trip with mom and my brother and sister to Montreal to see my grandparents’ and my dad’s brother’s resting places-first time in over 20 years. I’m glad we did.
J
I love all of this, except of course that loved ones are gone. But these are lovely ways to honor their memory.
Noemi
I love your ofrenda. I make one at school and have my own personal photos up on it. I love the tradition of telling stories about loved ones and remembering them. It’s a holiday I am happy to have a reason to celebrate now.
J
Thanks Noemi, I also really enjoy having this way to remember my loved ones. I miss them all, I think of them a lot, but it’s nice to put them all together for one or two days a year.
AC
Specifically putting that together for a specific time is a great idea. I am sure that it helps you to focus on your memories.
J
Yes, I really like it! Of course I remember these loved ones throughout the year as well, but I like this mindfulness.
Melissa
What a lovely tradition, and a good way of having a formal remembrance for your loved ones each year.
J
Thank you! I will admit that I enjoy it. It’s hard, it’s sad, but it feels good.
Maya
I’m paying my respects to your dear departed ones now, Julie.
What a lovely way to remember. Scout lives permanently on my altar, but next year, I will offer flowers as you’ve done.
Life does get more poignant as we get older… I keep getting flashes of myself as an elderly woman now and again and while I’m ready for that, I know it will mean I have lost so many who are dear to me.
<3
J
We have Mulder’s ashes in a lovely box with his picture, and I pet it when I walk past sometimes. Sigh.
My grandma and my great aunt both said that the hardest part about getting old was friends and family dying. I had an elderly friend that I made delivering Meals on Wheels, and when she moved into an assiste living facility nearby, I would go visit her from time to time. She told me she liked it there, she liked the friendships she made, she liked the staff and so on. She did not like that she kept making friends and they kept dying. 🙁
Maya
Gosh, Jules. I was so relieved on the day I brought Scout’s ashes home–it was like he was home in a way. Scout’s ashes are in a plain box, but by his picture, and I too pet him as I pass and tell him I love him. He definitely was my soul puppy.
J
I think it’s lovely that you felt relieved when you brought Scout home! I just felt bitter when I brought Mulder home. Bitter at a life gone far too soon, he was 7 when he was diagnosed with Lymphoma, and just turned 8 when it came back after his chemo. I do like having him here, though.
Allison McCaskill
I LOVE this. I’m absolutely going to start doing this next year (and yes, fuck cancer in its stupid fucking cancer face). My husband coincidentally ended up in Mexico for Day of the Dead, an eventuality he was completely unprepared for but found really amazing.
J
Fuck cancer in its stupid fucking cancer face! LOVE IT.