At The Mall
People didn’t really believe in war even while they planned it. The Salinas Valley lived about as it always had.
~ John Steinbeck, East of Eden
Ted and I were watching “NOW” the other night, an episode titled “Back to the Front” that followed troops from Fort Stewart, in Georgia, as they prepare to go to Iraq on their second, sometimes third, tour of duty. Although I have a dear friend who was a Captain in the Air Force, she left the military prior to September 11th, and never had to leave her children and husband behind while she went to war. Neither did she have to wait at home while her husband, also a Captain, went to war. Watching the show was difficult, seeing the stress that going into harm’s way, again and again, puts on these families. Some of the soldiers’ wives talked about the emotional distance that they have to put up between them, before the soldier even leaves, because the spouse at home effectively becomes a single parent while the soldier is away, with all of the pressures and decisions placed squarely upon their shoulders. The families wonder, will we ever see our beloved soldier again? And the answer is, we don’t know.
Making the problem worse, because of the strain on the military right now, not only are these soldiers having to go on more missions than they signed up for, more than is procedure or safe, they are also not receiving the training that they deserve and need, sometimes because of time constraints, and sometimes because there isn’t enough equipment on the base for them to be properly trained.
At one point, one of the soldiers spoke to the feeling of isolation for military families. He spoke to how the military and their families are bearing the weight of the war…that there is little sense outside of these families that there is even a war going on. He said, “We’re in Iraq, the rest of America is at the Mall.”  OUCH. And he’s right. Aside from the grim news we read in the paper or see on TV, what attachment do we have to what is going on over there? What connects us with their sacrifice, their lives? Nothing. I remember seeing movies and newsreels about WWII, about how we had food drives, rubber drives, blackouts, milk and meat rations…all of these ways that Americans at home were supporting their soldiers, not just by putting a bumper sticker on the back of their car, saying, “support our troops”, but by really giving things up. I think this afforded the country a sense that we were all in it together, that we were going to get through this, or not, but we were all together.
Where is that sense today? After September 11th, didn’t we all want to sacrifice? Didn’t we all want to come together as a nation, and try to fight against the evil that had attacked us, hunt it down and make our homes safe again? Wouldn’t we have suffered through meat rations, milk rations, gasoline rations, etc., in support of a war, if it were required of us? I certainly would have. But our economy has changed so much in the last 60 years, that if we don’t buy more this year than we bought last year, every year, it is a sign of a ‘lack of consumer confidence’, and the economy suffers. We all know what happens when the economy suffers. People lose their jobs. People in all walks of life are downsized and put out on the street. After September 11th, people wanted to stay home, connect with loved ones, come together and lick their wounds, and really had no interest in the newest fashions or a fancy new car. They were not allowed the time to make any sense of it all, to mourn our collective loss and try to understand what had happened. They were told, “Get back to work, get back to shopping, America is Back in Business.” I’ve never been more ashamed of my country as on that day, when I saw that the only way to support my country was to shop, to live beyond my means if necessary.
And now, here we are. Five years since the attacks, going on four years of war in Iraq. The disconnect between the soldiers and the lives they are living, the sacrifices of their families, and that of the average American, is a widening gulf, where we don’t have any reason to even try to breach that gap, other than to wave our flags on the holidays and declare our support, before going back to our bbqs and fireworks.
Our soldiers deserve better, and honestly, so do we.
10 Comments
Ml
First of all, this is an awesome post!
Second, I first got the “baseball bat to the head” when I watched Saving Private Ryan. All of the things you mentioned in your post hit me at that time. I’ve been thinking about them ever since. Our world has changed so much and we are so much more selfish.
I can’t begin to comprehend how those families must feel when their loved one has to go off to war. It’s got to be so devastating.
Py Korry
I agree with Ml…A great post! I was thinking of Tom Cruise at the 2002 Academy Awards where he made that psycho speech about how movies matter more than ever. Why? My favorite response to Cruise was an article in Salon that basically said “Message to celebs from the American public: Why the f*ck do you matter?”
ally bean
What a great post. There is a horrible disconnect between the reality of war and the fantasy world of the average American. I remember right after 9/11 we were all encouraged to be “checkbook patriots” and keep on spending. As if that’s the way to win a war!
There needs to be more news reporting like the show you saw. Reality is difficult, but we need to know.
Beenzzz
I agree with you wholeheartedly. Our troops do deserve better. They risk their lives every day. I can’t even imagine how their families deal with this day after day.
Gina
The families of the military are indeed pretty much the only ones that are shouldering the burden of this war. Oh, and our great-great granchildren, who will still be paying it off.
Donna
Hey J,
It’s Donna. Long time no see. I found you through Cherry…I love your blog.
This is a great post. I remember hearing WWII stories from my family and I used to watch war documentaries with my Dad (he served in Korea). Someone from every generation of my family has served in the military and we even have a Congressional Medal of Honor recipient on my Mom’s side. You are right, things are so different now.
If anyone who reads this comment would like to support members of the military, here is one organization that you can go through to do so: http://www.anysoldier.com/ Spence and I have sent a few packages and letters out. I’ve also knit hats and slippers for other charity knitting groups who send them to those serving overseas. It’s the least I can do.
There are so many organizations who support not only the military folks serving, but also the families waiting for them back home. It’s amazing the basic needs that are not being met for our military folks and their families. Actually is downright embarrassing.
Lalunas
There is a limit on what we American people can see on the war. Every thing is sensored. When the Vietnam war was in progress people watched it on their TV’s. Today our viewing is very different, softer. I don’t think you should be hard on yourself, it is what we are spoon fed by the media. The attitude we have today matches exactly what we ate in the first place. Sorry about the metaphors.
Mom101
Wow, totally amazing post J.
I think often about sacrifice, or lack thereof, and how committed our country would be to a war if they knew it actually required more of them than a yellow ribbon on the backs of their cars. I do think however that had we chosen to actually go fight the Taliban and Al Qaeda, the people who actually did threaten this country, the response would have been very different than the Iraq occupation.
I’m sure that a lot of those justifying the current foreign policy missteps with “well we’re better off without Sadaam” might change their tunes should they have to give something up in exchange. But after 9/11? Shew. I was totally on board with the anti-terrorist effort at any expense. Shame that that’s not where it ended up.
(And O.T., boy do I agree with you on toys in Happy Meals!)
Maya's Granny
A good and thought provoking post. As always, you make a mother proud.
Tabitha
Oh, J. Wonderfully written and wonderful insight.
Bravo, J. Bravo.
This right here is why I come back again and again. You have a way of putting into words what some of us are thinking, so very clearly.
Great, great post.